I am a failure

I am a failure.


I seriously don’t know where my last 4 months has gone by. I am getting eaten up by the tantrums of life, and I am completely unable to play against it. Defeat after defeat, cry after cry; I sermonize myself a couple of times to overcome, but absolute disappointment.

I am lost.

I am lost in my own net. Yes!

And the irony is, I am not able to figure out whether I am unfit for the work I am doing, am I suppose to do something else or this is what I am!

I am not fed up with life, but this is really not something that I had thought of.

I have almost stopped travelling (not officially), I have stopped reading, I have stopped writing. I love writing poems, but instead, I have started keeping myself packed inside a room hiding from the failure that I have come across.

I am writing this on Sunday, 18th March, 2012. This memoir is to remind myself one day in future, that I was collapsed.

I hate failures. I hate defeat. I love challenges. But my recent shortcomings are, I am unable to figure out, “I don’t know how to define challenges”. I just hope, I figure it out soon. Otherwise, I am a gone case.

A pulpit, once upon a time, has gone to litter.